Returning next week will be...

On the day: 
17/10/2012 

On the way: 
"The next train at... ... ..." 
Pause for effect. 
"Platform two... ... ..." 
Now that's an unfamiliar voice. Is this a cause for concern?. 
"Will be the 10.14 service to... ... ..." 
Wait for it. Wait for it. Oh, the suspense. What could it all mean? 
"Sevenoaks, calling at... ... ..." 
Well, that's just business as usual. What's the deal with the pregnant pauses? It's a new woman in the box. It must be - she sounds different. The previous one must have been promoted to somewhere more glamorous, such as Peckham Rye. Or even Balham, playing in the big leagues. 
"Shortlands... ... ..." 
Or maybe she's become the first casualty of the floral uprising - there can't be much space to run or hide from FARC (Floral Army for Revolution and Conquest) cadres in that little box - put to the sward, if you will...
"Bromley South... ... ..." 
The new woman in the box has a slightly weightier quality to her voice, a deeper tone. But that's not the only difference. 
"Bickley... ... ..." 
Unlike her predecessor, she has clearly been trained at the Strictly Come X Factor school of announcing. 
"Petts Wood... ... ..." 
Oh, get on with it, will you. The train will have come and gone by the time you've finished. There's no revelation involved here. We all have a pretty good idea of what stations are on this route. It's reassurance we want, not drama. 
"Orpington... ..." 
It's not as though the station with the lowest number of votes will have to leave the route, will it. Will it? Unless... Unless its an austerity measure, or another  licensing bungle, and the Government is trying to break it to the public in a format they are familiar with. 
"Chelsfield... ... ..." 
No no, on second thoughts, don't rush it. This could get exciting. 

On the pod: 
Time Again (live) - Asia 

On the front page: 
Now Gove rewrites the ruless on A levels 

On the subject: http://andhisthoughtsarefullofstrangers.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/sward-drawn.html