Witch washroom?

On the day:
14/04/2012


On the way:
At the entrance to the public lavatory, euphimistically derived from the Latin word for the washroom, lavare, to wash - yep, the Yanks have got their terminology spot-on, although I still feel 'the bog' better captures its spirit, not to mention the material manifestation, particularly when it comes to the men's facilities. 
And anyway so there's turnstiles and a counter where you can change your cash for coins, specifically 20p coins which is the going rate for a voidance nowadays, which is twice what it was ten years ago, and what kind of world is it where even bowel movements are subject to inflation. 
And anyway so the counter is an opening in a white wall and on the white wall are big square white tiles arranged running in rows parallel to the ground or in columns perpendicular to the ground depending on your perspective not that it matters because, the tiles being square, it's pretty much the same thing, much like Dokka Umarov captain of the Islamic Emirate of the North Caucasus Emirate and Steven Gerrard emir of Liverpool Football Club, and precisely like the Cheeky Girls, except... there are also a couple of geometric shapes, rhombuses I guess or rhombi, but let's just call them diamonds, in black to break up the monotony of the white walls because, let's face it, if you're standing outside a public lavvie and gazing at the walls, you're going to want something more interesting to look upon, are you not? Something like, for argument's sake, a diamond in black to the left of the counter and another diamond in black to the right of the counter. And if that's what you want, that's exactly what the obliging folks at the Station and Environs Public Lavatory Aesthetic Committee are going to provide. 
And anyway so approaching the facility in question from the east what meets my eyes is a lady with bouffy black hair in a long, dark coat, standing in front of the counter, reaching into her black patent leather purse with gold criss-cross stitching, presumably to extract money to change for 20p coins so that she can avail herself of the amenities. And from this angle the ellipse of her coiffure colludes with the upper point of the tiled diamond shape on the western side of the change counter to give the impression of a witch's hat. Which is just silly because why would a witch ask for change if she could use a simple hex to get through the turnstile?


On the pod:
The Swing Of Things - A-Ha


On the front page: 
Exposed: the reality behind London's 'ethical' Olympics