On the day:
11/07/2012
On the way:
He's got the goods, the boy in the grey zip-up hoodie underneath a charcoal hooded coat. He appears innocent enough, listening to his shiny, compact black mp3 player, looking down at his sharp Nike trainers with immaculate white souls.
But then a woman of a certain age (almost certainly in the mid-fifties), three seats away and opposite, with nondescript brown curls, specs and comfy clothes, prods his knee with her walking stick.
He raises his head. She mouths words at him, exaggerated, like your mum does when she doesn't want anyone to realise she's revealing to you that your junior school drama teacher is homosexual.
He rolls his eyes, like you do when your mum mouths words at you because she doesn't want anyone to realise she's revealing to you that your junior school drama teacher is homosexual.
But when a two seats open up next to her, he moves over to one cautious seat away. And when he knows the moment is right, when he believes no one is watching, he surreptitiously slips her... his half-drunk bottle of Lucozade.
He returns to the contemplation of his nifty Nikes, and she drains the refreshing orange draught.
The transaction is complete. It seems innocuous enough and the monkey's off her back. For now. But mark my words, she'll be back for more. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but she'll be back.
And where will this lead, this unsanctioned trade that is rearing its ugly head in the cold light of day? This shameless consumption of energy drinks on public transport? Will we see teenagers quaffing Monster on street corners, parents cracking a can of Red Bull in full view of their children? Next thing you know they'll be on supermarket shelves and cornerstore fridges.
Call me paranoid if you will. Just don't say you were never warned.
On the pod:
To The Shore - Duran Duran
On the front page:
Get set for the wettest Games ever (Metro)
They get their fixes wherever they can thesedays!
ReplyDeleteI had an interesting observation on the train home last night.
Opposite me sat a businessman next to his wife (or maybe his secretary), he's dressed in an expensive suit, silk tie and italian brogues, she's wearing a fairly smart white blouse, a less smart burgandy skirt and the obligatory clerical after-work white reebok classic trainers.
He proceeds to sigh and tell her how bad his day's been while she nods in all the right places. He then removes his tie and passes it to her, and she pops it in her handbag. He then goes on to remove his shirt collar. I'm impressed. That must be some shirt.
"That's better", he says and puffs his cheeks out. He's clearly had a very stressful day. She smiles at him lovingly and pops the collar in the bag with the tie.
When you see a 50-something woman doing Jägerbombs on the train, that's when you really need to start worrying…
ReplyDelete